MRI x Two

It’s been a big week. Some notes:

  1. Gavin had his MRI last Saturday, which was his first to be done annually. I haven’t had any news from that scan. It wasn’t the smoothest day for my boy. He’s deeply traumatized by the ongoing pain of IVs, and unfortunately had to act as pincushion for an unpracticed nurse. The second nurse, a seasoned professional, talked him down and managed to get an okay site. Things were proceeding well, until he had a panic in the machine and screamed to be let out. That’s the first time that that’s happened. We had to stop the scan, pull him out and calm him. After a breather, he got back in and finished. He felt better after pancakes and an Oreo milkshake, as all of us would.  He and I will be back at hospital next week for his kidney ultrasound and first clinic appointment with After-Care.


2. Skye’s MRI was yesterday. The appointment was for TWO-THIRTY. She had to fast the whole day, and was only allowed apple juice until 11:30. The order of the day was distract, distract, distract. She woke up at 5:30 and asked for breakfast. I played with her for two solid hours while Craig took Gavin out for breakfast. She was alright until after her gymnastics class at 10:30, at which point, she started to feel pretty wobbly. I think she thought if she just asked me for the right food, I would give it to her. “Mummy, I have fruit bar? Mummy, I want cashews. I need snack. How ’bout… hummus and crackers?” etc. I explained to her as gently as I could that for her “special appointment” the doctor said no food, but that we would get a treat as soon as it was done. After collecting Christine, our friend and nanny, to help, we drove to the hospital, helpless as Skye wailed the whole way asking for food. Thankfully, she was calm when we got there, distracted by new toys in the Play Park. The difficult bit was sneaking food for myself without her seeing me. In the end, the scan was done, a bit late, but no struggles after anaesthesia, which is always good. We were eating snacks and treats in the Atrium by 5:00. Needless, to say, a long day.

And now to wait for results. With no word so far today, my brain does this: They probably would have called if they’d seen something. They’ll call later to say that everything is alright. But what if the scan has just slipped through the cracks and no one’s had the time to look at the images yet, and something IS wrong, and then they’ll call me later to tell me that but I’ll be expecting everything to be okay. What if my phone rings RIGHT NOW – I’ll have a heart attack on the spot.

And so, the days after scans are long. Everything seems okay, but the fear that things are not okay is just…difficult to live with.


Here is a cute picture of Skye having her first skate last weekend. Something to distract me on this grey day.

6 Responses to “MRI x Two”

  1. Monica McDonald says:

    Here’s what I don’t know. I don’t know what it is like to be a mom and I don’t know what it’s like to me the mother of a wee babe that has had to endure the everything of dealing with a brain tumour. What I have experienced is your loving heart. What I can do is imagine what you must be going through and tears leap to my eyes and my throat constricts as I do. My beautiful Erica, I just want you to know that I am with you and mightily sending those positive thoughts and love as I write this on this grey day. An image of me as Anne Shirley fiercely closing her eyes, with clenched fists and aiming her love straight at you came to mind. I’ve got plucky optimism too!

    Love always, Monica

  2. erica says:

    This just brought tears to my eyes. Such beautiful words, Monica! Thank you so much for your love and support, friend. xoxo

  3. Karen says:

    Love Monica’s post! Love you brave Erica and Craig, and of course Gavin and Skye. Sending strong energy and love. It’s always worked! ?

  4. Christine says:

    Yesterday was a long one for you and Skye, although I came in half way, it seemed long as we waited.
    My mom used to worry. She was the typical “worry-wort”. Now with my own kids, I worry. And my adoptive kids too – Gavin and Skye – I worry about them. I believe all moms worry.
    BUT, I can’t help smiling when I see their smiles. And hurt when I hear their cries.
    My days are filled with soooo much joy every time I am with Gavin and Skye.
    Let their sun shine on you when they are smiling, hoping it fills you and feeds you when they are not.
    I believe your two are here to bring sunshine to many, many people.
    Thank you for allowing me to know and care for them both.
    Hugs, always here for you and Craig xo

  5. Gail Thomas says:

    Hoping for practised nurses next time with the IV – I don’t know why inexperienced people are allowed to continue trying on the same patient. It should be two attempts maximum and then if they can’t do it, they should call an expert. I saw my father go through misery with IVs.

    Gavin has been so brave with the MRIs – I totally understand the anxiety this time. I don’t think I would have his courage.

    Best wishes to you all. It is such good news that Gavin is on to annual check-ups now.

  6. Anonymous says:

    We are thinking of you and praying for a clear result. Wish we were there to lend a hand or give you all a hug. Xx Meaghan

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